Running Man

The Great North Run - the World's most famous and popular half marathon - is this very Sunday, and as you might well know Christopher Jackson is putting on his racing galoshes, streamlined woollen jodhpurs, and wind-resistant straw-boater to run it. I know what you're thinking: won't he still be too full from eating all that evil Stephen King birthday cake last week? No! This man has been in training for months; through heat and hail and rain and raging wind to take part in this race. Why, not even the attempted-but-foiled theft of his shins by the evil and inscrutable leg-thief, Doktor Mikhael Limmsnikker, could set this man back!

In all seriousness, I wish Chris all the best for Sunday. He's running for a really great cause, to fight Motor Neurone Disease, and you can donate money here. I hope to be on the sidelines on Sunday to support him and the thousands of dedicated runners who'll be out there.

Besides, if I'm not there who'll make sure that cheeky Hare doesn't cheat against the Tortoise? No jetpacks allowed!