Hy-pathetic-al Questions...

In coming up with ideas for cartoons I usually end up with some odd hypothetical questions. Often a hypothetical question can make a great cartoon (that’s how I came up with, among others, the dragon having a sneezing fit on a date). But sometimes I’ll come up with one that boggles the mind and can’t be answered. At least, I can’t answer them. Maybe you can. Below are some of the many questions that I’ve had scribbled down on bits of paper on the board above my desk over the years. Some of them have a germ of a cartoon-worthy idea in them, others are just the stuff I think of at random while living my life. If you can think of an answer to any of these (or a hilarious response) don’t keep it to yourself – share it with the rest of the class! And if you can think of your own hypothetical question then let us know about that too!

-Why didn’t the Three Musketeers carry muskets instead of swords?

-We all know a Pumpkin Seed grows into a Pumpkin, and a Poppy Seed grows into a Poppy, but what does a Sesame Seed grow into? A Sesame? And what does one of them look like?

-All good Dogs go to Heaven, but what about Dogs that lead good lives and who are Atheists?

-‘Monkey See, Monkey Do’ – okay, but what if a monkey commits suicide in front of his mates?

-How far can infinity expand in an infinite amount of time?

-Who determines how sticky glue is?

-Are the oceans just God’s soup that he wouldn’t eat because he’d over-seasoned it with too much salt?

-A monkey, a hawk and a cat are locked in a room with a chainsaw, a revolver and a banana – which animal comes out alive?

-If a person who always tells lies and who has been lying on a bed of lye calls you on the phone and tells you that they’re still lying on that bed of lye, are they a liar?

-Why aren't cows able to milk themselves?

-Don’t fish have ridiculously high-sodium levels from all that salty seawater?

-Are the other fowl like the turkey and the partridge bitter that the chicken is the most popular bird to eat, or are they relieved?

-What would bananas look like if they were grown in a zero-gravity atmosphere?

-How many numbers are there?