Saturday, 29 August 2009

'Oomph'

Don't you hate it when you're writing a story and suddenly you just get a bit... well, stuck. The story might suddenly seem to drag and you can't write a way out, or maybe you've hit an unexpected dramatic dead-end in the plot and don't know where to go from there, or maybe you've lost the inspiration to keep writing a particular section. Well fear not. Some of these suggestions will put the 'oomph' back into any story. Just insert one of these sentences at the point where you've got stuck and then write from there using the sentence as a cue! Simples!

-Just then, a dinosaur entered.

-"So, how 'bout that Internet, eh?" (insert character name) asked.

-Suddenly the face of Gary Busey appeared on every television screen around the world.

-"Ahh..." said (insert character name), "remember the time we were trapped in the canyon and facing that buffalo stampede with just a soup spoon and an inflatable mattress?"

-And then the milkman spontaneously combusted.

-At that moment a clown entered and proceeded to drop his trousers.

-The next day, the Moon Men invaded. They brought ice cream with them.

-Without warning, random gunfire rang out from the nearby Special Effects warehouse.

-There was a sound of glass shattering. He/she/they turned and looked. Standing in window was Steven Seagal, dressed as a cockerel and breathing heavily.

-Suddenly (insert character name) burst in. "Someone's stolen all the toasters!" he/she/they shouted.

-"Don't look now," (insert character name) said quietly, "but a weasel has just crawled up your trouser leg."

-In the morning a lawyer called at the house to tell (insert character's name) that their rich uncle had died and left them his 'former-abbatoir-turned-mansion' to them, so long as they spend one whole night in it.

-And then he/she/ woke up, only to find a badger had gained entry to their bedroom and was eating the alarm clock.

-Too late I/he/she/they realised that the brush salesman I/he/she/they had invited in was actually a ravenous bear.

-Suddenly everyone burst into song, belting out the lyrics to the Lemon Tree song until their voices were hoarse.

-That night, at the Wood-Choppers' Ball, fisticuffs broke out.

-Twenty four hours went by before anything of interest happened. And then...

-The phone rang. It was The President of the Federated States of Micronesia calling. And he was pissed as hell.

1 comments:

Nicole said...

Hahahahahahahaha! You make me laugh, Rob. I especially liked the Steven Seagal one :)